FUS RO...

Here's another update from a very irritated and miffed Valhalla. I planned on tonight's Skyrim adventure being peaceful and with as little stress as possible. Yeah, like I ever get what I want in games. Tonight was the total opposite of everything I wanted. It was filled with fury, stress and disappointment. Tonight was the worst night of Skyrim ever experienced. You know what makes it worse? My laptop killed ALL the screen I took and so it's a pictureless post. I'll find those pictures, I will. I'm sorry about the lack of screenshots.

I woke up in a warm bed in Whiterun, ready to conquer all that stood in my path. I was able to purchase both a house and horse, and did so rather quickly. I decorated my home with every piece of furniture imaginable and my servant-slave-woman moved in with me (she has a weird habit of sitting in my bedroom). Everything seemed alright at this point, I had everything I wanted, had purchased my horse and was well on my way to success. What could go wrong? I tell you that a lot can go wrong.

I realized that I hadn't yet returned the Golden Claw and figured that I should probably take a trip down to Riverwood to deliver that to its rightful owner. Dragging my woman, Lydia, along with me we travelled back to the little village Hadvar had take me to not so long ago. It was actually quite nice going back to that place, with it's little houses and care-free villagers. However, determined to get on with my main quest I had to hurry my delivery up and so gave the Golden Claw back without delay. He actually seemed quite surprised that I was returning it. I wasn't sure if I should be offended or amused. Once that was returned I was eager to get to the Grey Beards that were waiting for me. I hopped onto my horse and began riding towards my destination as fast as I could.

Lydia and I were pretty underwhelmed by the enemies we encountered - the wild dogs weren't much of a threat. It was only when we came to a forked road that we encountered our most difficult enemy yet. Galloping up the fork, I was expecting to face something when I saw the little steps. However, I was not expecting to face something quite as horrific as what I saw. I hit 'save' just before I attacked the giant troll that stood before me, and I really should have saved a little earlier. The troll took me out in one hit, taking me under the jaw with his massive great club. I fell limp and broken to the ground, and the game went to load at my last save place - right before the beast hit me. There was no escape, for several minutes the beast just kept killing me, my body landing in a different way each time. Unable to escape and angered by what was happening I was forced to start from the autosave - Riverwood. Yay, back here again. Well, at least I know where to save next time and that I should avoid the trolls.

Overcoming my irritation I began my journey again, chatting to an enthusiastic cook on my way, something that certainly lightened my spirits. I was feeling more confident about this one, and made sure to avoid the trolls, killing only the wild dogs that nipped at my horse's legs. As I trotted along the path I heard a chilling roar and the ground shook beneath me. looking into the sky, I saw a massive great dragon swooping through the sky and blotting out the sun with its enormous wings. I was not impressed. Not wanting to run into it, I galloped away, ignoring the cries for help from frightened revellers. Well, I ignored them for a moment. The hero within me rose up and forced me to dismount and see what was up. By the time I reached them they were happily drinking again and offering me mead - which I declined. As there was no more trouble I continued on my way.

It took a while, but I reached my destination eventually. After reaching the little town that was home to the Grey Beards I was expecting them to be sitting in a little wooden hut smoking pipes around an open fire, hot soup in their hands. No, of course not, they're at the top of the seven THOUSAND steps. With a heavy sigh, I dropped my horse at the mountain base and began to climb the seven thousand steps, Lydia following close behind me. We were attacked by wild dogs several times, but nothing prepared me for what was at the top. I saved the game just as a giant yeti-troll came bounding towards me (this situation feels strangely familiar). What happened next? Yes, it killed me and I was stuck in the loop of death again. Filled with Rage, I had to open the autosave at Riverwood, starting my journey all over again.

I was not a happy bunny. I was, in fact, filled with indescribable rage and spitting poisoned tacks. Muttering and mumbling, I got some new and better armour from the smithy before starting all over again, my slave woman trailing behind me. This time, the game froze and I had to take ten to calm down before starting up again. when I did start up again, everything seemed to be running smoothly...until a dragon came and jumped on top of me, snapping me up in his jaws without me being able to do a thing. I could have taken the dragon if he hadn't caught me by surprise. Serious.

With the dragon out of the way (meaning I went back to my last save...not Riverwood), I was able to return to the seven thousand steps and climb them all over again. This time I was a lot more calculated when it came to the yeti-troll, and after several failed attempts I decided to leave Lydia with the monsters and leg it past it, never looking back...you never look back. It worked, and whilst I should have felt bad for leaving my woman behind, I felt nothing and continued on my way. She did not sound impressed when she caught up with me, I may have to watch myself when I'm asleep tonight. Regardless, we finally made it to the Grey Beards, and I have never been happier to see an ominous looking tower in my life. slowly, we climbed the stairs.

The guys inside were very welcoming. They made me shout at them, which felt amazing and impressed them. Convinced I was a Dragonborn, they taught me the second part of my relentless shout (Ro) and also taught me Whirlwind. I really took to those funny little priests, they were very polite and respectful of me. Eager to continue working on me, they gave me a quest to complete, and I happily accepted.

Fellow adventurers, that it where I left off - outside the fortress staring at the sunset with Lydia. Next time, my adventure will continue, hopefully with less problems than before.